So I'm sitting here, a cup of tea and rollies on hand, on a grey rainy autumn afternoon (i ain't got a job... are u mad!!... am I???), in my Wonderful Mother's house, i don't live here i WISH I did though...

The shocking death of Gary Speed aswell as all the other tragic high-profile deaths this year, not to mention the millions of others who I'm not even aware of the existence of... has really made me think about my own life and place in the world, or should i say lack of life and place...

How did it become this way, how did i become a person who it's alright not to care about, any answers anyone, anyone outthere gonna save me, why doesn't someone, one of you reading this just send me an e-mail just a message something...